Peckerwood Manor

Welcome, sloots, to the latest edition of "Who's This Week's Thirstiest Ho?" We've got three nearly-mummified candidates positively begging for moisture, so let's dive right in, shall we?  First up, we have Jon Stewart - giving his best "aw, shucks" look above - who must have been feeling extra-parched these past few years, since everything he did seemed to tank. There was his HBO animated series which HBO sadly dumped before it went on the air; a comedy tour with his good buddy Dave Chappelle which was sadly deemed "disappointing;" a movie he directed called "Irresistible" which critics sadly pronounced "lame brained" and "insulting;" and his Apple TV show, which, yes, sadly, nobody watched and was only recently cancelled (since, whoopsie, Apple didn't want him to go anywhere near touchy subjects like China because that's where their iPhones are assembled). What's a fallen Bro Idol to do? Especiall