OPEN POST: Jason Kelce's Super Bowl Ring Went Missing in a Pool of Skyline Chili

In news that somehow tracks, Jason Kelce - seen above looking like a slightly evolved King Kong whose winter coat has begun to shed - says he lost his Super Bowl LII ring in a pool of Skyline Chili. 

Taylor Swift's boyfriend's brother, as most people know him and his biggest claim to fame, lost the ring during The Great Lombardy Games at the University of Cincinnati. I'm not sure, but I guess it's where a bunch of dudes writhe around in a big ass pool of greasy, slippery chili to, uh, "compete" with one another for a chance to win....uh, I don't know what, actually....the possibility of coming ass to face with another man in front of lots of excited people in a strictly hetero, non-homoerotic kind of way? It's all very straight and macho, guys, there's no undercurrent of sexual tension here WHATSOEVER! Just super alpha manly bro stuff, okay?!

Anyhor, Kelce says the ring remains missing, and that it's likely "now in a landfill someplace in the Cincinnati tri-state area." No word on whether or not he plans to frolic atop a mountain of hot garbage with his bros in an attempt to, uh...what were we doing again? Oh yeah, locating the ring...yeah, that's it!