EVENING NIGHTCAP: Taylor Lautner...who? Tammy & Ana? Golden Retrievers Take Over.

 

► In case you were wondering what Taylor Lautner has been up to since the Twilight flicks and a litany of career failures that are longer than the explanation our office intern gave for being late (again), then the wait is over. Taylor has signed up to produce and star in, "Taylor Lautner: Werewolf Hunter".  Hang on a sec while I laugh at this. Ha, ha, ha! Waaaa ha ha ha! The series is being developed by Amazon MGM Studios.  The synopsis below had to be written by ChatGPT because it's about as riveting as a watching Taylor pluck his eyebrows. The series reeks of desperation for someone who's best years are in the rear view mirror. Read More

 "Taylor is drawn into a secret society of werewolf trackers who need his unique expertise. As he navigates his double life—Hollywood actor by day, supernatural warrior by night—Taylor must wrestle with the ultimate irony: fighting the very creatures that made him famous. Between saving the world, reviving his career, and falling in love, he faces the ultimate question—what happens when your biggest role becomes your greatest enemy?” 

Comment: Taylor is still under the delusion he has talent. The 5 Razzie nominations and 2 wins hasn't convinced him he can't act for shit. Taylor is to the Razzies what Meryl Streep is to the Oscars. Dude is going to ride his stint as a werewolf in Twilight until it withers away from a silver bullet to the ass.

Taylor Lautner, undated. Photo: Getty Images / Variety.com

► Award season is just around the corner. That's the only explanation for Tammy Cruise (62) and Ana deArmas (36) photographed having dinner on Feb 14 - VD day. Awe, a romantic "meeting" made in tabloid heaven.  The paps captured them having a cozy dinner, probably exchanging a  Cosmo or Buzzfeed  compatibility quiz on favorite desserts and finding your soulmate. If you forgot who Ana is, she was Bennito Affleck's GF before he married Jennifer Lopez-Noa-Judd-Almost Affleck-Anthony-Almost Rodriguez-Affleck-TBD.  When Ana was asked about the dinner, she coyly didn't answer any questions. I'm sure her people told her to keep her yap shut as that would build "mystery" and media attention. No comment from Tammy's starship. Read More

Comment: Ana is 36 years old. Given Tammy's bingo card of women that meet Xenu's approval, she's waaaay past her prime. Then again, nothing like sloppy seconds for the both of them. Ana can get another career jolt by strapping herself to an A-list actor since it worked out so well when she was with Benny. And, since Tammy can't seem to date anyone in his age range, being seen with Ana will give him that boost he craves to maintain the illusion that he's still a youthful movie star.  Win-win if this pans out. 

Ana deArmas and Tom Cruise. Photo: Connor Reid/ Marca.com

 

► Several days ago the small town of Golden, Colorado was taken over by hundreds of Golden Retriever.  I see what those clever bitches did there.  "Goldens on Golden" is an annual event that was started in 2019 as a way to increase business for small independent shop owners and bring tourists to the town. The lovable doggies and their slobbery owners posed for a photo under the famous arch that greets visitors to the town.  Read More

Comment: What a cool idea. I hope they had lots of poop bags cause that's a lot of Goldies running around. 

Goldens on Golden Event, Feb. 2025. Photo: Visit Golden & F4DStudio/Martha Stewart.com