Peckerwood Manor

Welcome, fellow trollops, to the latest edition of "Who's This Week's Thirstiest Ho?" Today's trio are drier than a rock-hard crouton that fell from your salad to the kitchen floor three months ago and was nose-butted, then ignored, by your adorable cat - who dearly wishes you'd sweep once in a while, goddammit - so they need all the moisture they can get.  First, behold before and after pics of Brad Pitt , the left from 2022, the right from 2023. Subtle? Yes, I'd say so, especially since many aging male stars lately look as if they've gotten their faces smoothed out on an ironing board. By the way, I'm not starting off this week's post with needless digressions. I simply want to point out that Brad very much cares about his money-making puss - which means that he does, in fact, care about things. No, really. Like all those poor, destitute Hurricane Katrina victims in... oh, wait . Does Brad care about his children? For sure, and definitely mor...

Welcome, sloots, to the latest edition of "Who's This Week's Thirstiest Ho?" We've got three nearly-mummified candidates positively begging for moisture, so let's dive right in, shall we?  First up, we have Jon Stewart - giving his best "aw, shucks" look above - who must have been feeling extra-parched these past few years, since everything he did seemed to tank. There was his HBO animated series which HBO sadly dumped before it went on the air; a comedy tour with his good buddy Dave Chappelle which was sadly deemed "disappointing;" a movie he directed called "Irresistible" which critics sadly pronounced "lame brained" and "insulting;" and his Apple TV show, which, yes, sadly, nobody watched and was only recently cancelled (since, whoopsie, Apple didn't want him to go anywhere near touchy subjects like China because that's where their iPhones are assembled). What's a fallen Bro Idol to do? Especiall...