Peckerwood Manor

Welcome, fellow trollops, to the latest edition of "Who's This Week's Thirstiest Ho?" Today's trio are drier than Chrissy Teigen's fashionable "underwear dress" at the Olympics Opening Ceremony, so they need all the moisture they can get. First up, the Internet's favorite critter-infested pass-around-peen. I'm referring, of course, to Pete Davidson , who's been linked to countless Hollywood camel toes thirsting for publicity, or so it seems, because unless Pete's diseased tube steak is irresistible, than I, for one, do not get what's going on here - and probably don't want to know for my own mental health. Pete is the Fred Durst  of comedians, the Jaden Smith of actors, and, yes, the ass from which the worm escaped and nibbled on Robert F. Kennedy, Jr's  brain matter. Given his girlfriend track record - which includes the alleged model,  Emily Ratajkowski ; nepo-nothing throw cushion,  Kaia Gerber ; doughnut enemy,  Arian

Welcome, fellow trollops, to the latest edition of "Who's This Week's Thirstiest Ho?" Today's trio are drier than Glen Powell's  look-at-me lumpy cum gutters, so they need all the moisture they can get. First up, a nepo half-sibling with no discernible talent except for hitching his wagon to his famous half-sister's ratchet ponytail. Yes, I speak of Frankie Grande , the professional gay who has every gay whipping out their vellum fans, aerating their nipples and huffily intoning, "We don't know her." The straights don't know him, either, but ever since outing himself as the hungriest of attention hors on 2012's "Big Brother 16," in which he proclaimed himself a "social media mogul," made racist comments about Black contestant Devin Shepherd and said, "Lesbians choose to be gay, while men do not," Frankie's been scratching and crawling and guzzling anything within reach to quench his desperate thirst.