WHO'S THIS WEEK'S THIRSTIEST HO? Is it Drew Barrymore? Or Jessica Simpson? Or Scrabble And Chill?
Welcome, fellow trollops, to the latest edition of "Who's This Week's Thirstiest Ho?" Today's trio are drier than a used, three-week old tea bag stuck to the floorboard next to your trashcan, so they need all the moisture they can get. First up, a familiar parched face, Hollywood's darlingest scab , Drew Barrymore, who is once more here to remind us that her cute-wittle-girl routine is well past its sell-by date. To be honest, it’s been that way for a while, or ever since she began hosting her own talk show where slobbering over her guests like an over-eager puppy, crying and holding their hands became her "winsome" trademark - something she sometimes does while wearing overalls (which is unacceptable!). Of course, most of mankind and galaxies beyond already know that Drew had a rough childhood which included drugs, more drugs, and, yes, more drugs. I feel like it's been drilled into our subconscious by now - along with Lindsay Lohan’s drunk dri