OPEN POST: Barbie owned the weekend and made "grown" men cry!

Hold on while I wipe tears from laughing so hard I can't breathe. So The Wall Street Journal's whiny little baby boys were so beside themselves that they took a break from smugly encouraging greed to stand against Barbie. I thought they were too busy kissing evil troll Rupert Murdoch's shriveled-up ass flaps to give a shit about a movie about a doll but apparently not. It probably irked them to see a blonde, blue-eyed beauty espousing feminist ideals and not interested in becoming the Trad Wife they think women should be. Their ideal woman is as plastic as possible while still being considered part of the human race, who worships her man and is better seen and not heard. Their medieval assertions about gender roles got a beating, and it was from (oh no!) a woman! Who knew that a comedic reality show would spin-off from the movie before it even opened. These fragile crybabies are so outlandish in their man-sized tantrums that even 1950 Barbie gives them the side-eye.

Their dislike of this film (I am convinced) helped drive more people to theatres resulting in Barbie raking in a record-breaking 155 million dollars, making it the highest-grossing opening of the year. The reviews have been very positive, and Barbie will become the blockbuster rarely seen outside of superhero franchises these days; or is Barbie, it can be argued, a superhero of sorts in her own right? There will likely be a sequel or the creation of a Barbieverse where the storylines focus on the other dolls in Dreamland. 

So I am all in for Barbiemania! Barbiecore! Barbiefever! I want this movie to keep beating the odds, knowing what it is doing to people who deserve all the psychic pain this bombshell can dish out.