BLAST FROM THE PAST: Boone's Farm

 

Photo: Cellar Tracker.com

In the world of cheap wine, there's only one product that staggers to the top of the heap like no other:  Boone's Farm.  This elixir of the gods occupies a special place in gas stations mini marts, liquor stores, and other purveyors of cheap booze. Boone's Farm is the granddaddy who paved the drunken path for others to follow like Four Loko, Mikes Hard Lemonade, White Claw and even my favorite California Coolers (which doesn't exist anymore). Boone's Farm was THE beverage of choice for drunken hijinks. As one would expect, the history of Boone's Farm is wrapped in a brown paper bag of treachery, subterfuge, and savvy business thinking.  

EJ Gallo is the maker of Boone's Farm. The company is still family owned and manged by descendants of  Joe Gallo, Sr. and 2 of his 3 sons Ernest and Julio Gallo. The company was started after Prohibition by Joe Gallo Sr. He set out to build a wine empire that would mass produce cheap wine for people who lived in the fringe of society. Yes...that was his actual goal.  Despite his business success, Joe's life was in shambles. He and his wife died in a murder-suicide in 1933. 

Joe Gallo Sr. and his wife. Photo: Find a Grave.com

Joe Sr.'s estate was to be split evenly between his 3 sons: Ernest, Julio, and Joe Jr. However, Ernest and Julio had other plans and decided to create their own partnership to screw over Joe Jr. To extend an olive branch to keep the peace with Joe Jr., Ernest and Julio decided to hire him. But then Joe Jr. started using the family name to sell cheese. This enraged Ernest and Julio who then fired Joe Jr.  Well, Joe Jr. wasn't going to take any more of their crap. He sued and the 3 brothers engaged in a vicious, long-ass legal battle for many years that ended with Ernest and Julio winning. Defeated, Joe Jr started a farm called Joseph Farm; and from what I was able to find, he lived a quiet life.

After the dust settled, Ernest and Julio continued pursuing their dad's dream to create an empire that produced cheap wine. They introduced Boone's Farm in 1961. Their first product was an apple wine that used fermented apples instead of grapes. Over time, additional flavors were added including the popular Strawberry Hill. Things were going well for them until 1991 when the US Congress raised the tax on wine by 500%. It forced Gallo to reformulate the products to skirt the new taxes. They switched from being flavored wine products to malt beverages. This legally changed the classification of the products along with the taste. But you know what? Booze hounds didn't care. And today, they still don't. As one super fan from Syracuse, New York wrote on the Boone's Farm fan site:

"Nothing goes sitting naked in the dark watching Golden Girls reruns on mute while listening to REM's "Everybody Hurts" like six or eight bottles of Boones". 

Photo: The Thrillist

Today, Boone's Farm continues to be the beverage of choice for connoisseurs of second-rate wine who appreciate a good hangover. You can find the products at most convenience stores, supermarkets, or liquor stands. And, if you can't, then ask any teenager hanging outside a Smokin' Joe Liquor & Tobacco Outlet. Their varsity lineup includes:

• Snow Creek Berry: a medley of berries that will lead you to talking to the cops at 2:00 am.
  
• Strawberry Hill: flat Sprite mixed with cough syrup with the smell of a sweaty car back seat.
  
• Apple Wine: a blend of sweet & tart apples that will evoke a steady stream of life' regrets. 
  
• Blue Hawaiian: a pina colada that had a one night stand with a cotton ball soaked in Everclear.
• Sangria: grape juice fermented with mystery fruits and some Sunny D in a pickle barrel.
  

Julio Gallo died in 1993 in a car accident. He was 83. Ernest Gallo died in 2007 (he was 97).  Joe Jr. died in 2007 from a series of strokes (he was 88). Ernest's and Julio's kids and grandchildren run the company.  Below is an old Boone's Farm commercial. I'd say that Joe Sr. dream of building an empire that prides itself in selling low-brow wine was achieved.

Source:  Mashed.com; Thrillist.com; The Takeout.com