PECKERWOOD'S WEEKLY LUNOCRACY POST! For the Week of 7/14/2025
The Epstein Files, The MAGA Circus & The DNC Mime Show
HEADLINE ACT: MAGA EATS ITSELF
-The Epstein Files “Don’t Exist” — just like the tooth fairy, Pam Bondi’s conscience, and the orange menace's reading comprehension.
-MAGA hardliners are fuming, accusing the orange menace of running cover for pedo-billionaires while tweeting about hamburgers.
-Laura Loomer’s Eye Twitch now has its own spin-off podcast.
-Alex Jones wants a revolution. Again. From his mansion. With supplements.
-The Epstein Files “Don’t Exist” — just like the tooth fairy, Pam Bondi’s conscience, and the orange menace's reading comprehension.
-MAGA hardliners are fuming, accusing the orange menace of running cover for pedo-billionaires while tweeting about hamburgers.
-Laura Loomer’s Eye Twitch now has its own spin-off podcast.
-Alex Jones wants a revolution. Again. From his mansion. With supplements.
-But they are still waving flags and pretending the orange menace never said he wanted to end the Constitution.
-Plenty of them are shouting "deep state" when asked about their dentist appointment.
-Quite a number are sobbing into Freedom Fries because a Starbucks cup had rainbows on it.
“You said you’d drain the swamp — not flood it with bleach and Botox.” — A MAGA supporter, probably, screaming into a Chick-fil-A napkin.
SECOND ACT: THE DEMOCRATS – THE PARTY OF TAP DANCE AND TEPIDNESS
-They did have that fundraiser featuring charcuterie.
-And dear old Pete Buttigieg was seen blinking in Morse code from a train.
-Kamala Harris said something vaguely empathetic, then vanished back into whatever wardrobe she Narnia’d into.
-Kamala Harris said something vaguely empathetic, then vanished back into whatever wardrobe she Narnia’d into.
-At least The DNC did not endorse the blandest possible NYC mayoral candidate.
-Okay wait — scratch that last one. They absolutely did. In fact, they all but handed a soft-serve cone and a $10 gift card to whoever pledged to "be normal" and not "scare white people."
“We care deeply about transparency,” said a DNC spokesperson, while shredding donor receipts with one hand and spoon-feeding Wall Street with the other.
“We care deeply about transparency,” said a DNC spokesperson, while shredding donor receipts with one hand and spoon-feeding Wall Street with the other.
SPECIAL FEATURE: UK HONORABLE MENTIONS
-Prince Andrew, the Human Allegation, is now the Royal Family’s most expensive paperweight. Still no apology. Still no accountability. Still has a those jacked up teef.
-Rishi Sunak wants you to know inflation is down but so are your rights.
-Nigel Farage was last seen yelling at a cashier over the metric system after returning like a political bedbug.
-Rishi Sunak wants you to know inflation is down but so are your rights.
-Nigel Farage was last seen yelling at a cashier over the metric system after returning like a political bedbug.
-Labour finally won and now everyone’s bracing to find out what they actually stand for beyond not being Tories. I am waiting...
LUNOCRACY WISH LIST:
-Pam Bondi Resign. Then start an OnlyFans. Let your true skills pay the bills.
-The orange menace release the files or stop pretending you’re anything more than a merch salesman with delusions of martyrdom.
-Democratic Leadership Find a spine. If not, borrow one from a taxidermy exhibit.
-The Epstein List Make it public. Unredacted. On C-SPAN. With dramatic readings by Morgan Freeman and Cardi B.
-The orange menace release the files or stop pretending you’re anything more than a merch salesman with delusions of martyrdom.
-Democratic Leadership Find a spine. If not, borrow one from a taxidermy exhibit.
-The Epstein List Make it public. Unredacted. On C-SPAN. With dramatic readings by Morgan Freeman and Cardi B.
***Okay Okay Pigs did actually fly this week and Democrats did do something funny. I grudgingly will give them some credit for trolling the orange menace with the X bot. However, where was this harassment in 2024?
If your moral compass is spinning, it’s because there’s no North left in American politics.
Just a pile of corporate cash, expired subpoenas, and a bipartisan addiction to empty theatrics. The US is governed by a reality show cast that is now freelancing on America's dime.
Comments
Post a Comment