OPEN POST: The Sunday Roast featuring Vermin Supreme!

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Say hello to your new President!

CTSaunders.com

This magnificent specimen of democracy is literally the only candidate who bothered to run for president this midterm election!!! Can you believe it???

Now, I know Bree will say this belongs in Lunocracy, but aren’t we all in one now? Might as well enjoy it:

While officially a member of the Pirate Party, Vermy excellently represents the strain of Absurdism that’s so toxic to people with a stick up their ass. He has been running for President since 1996, at times doing pretty well (third place in the Libertarian race), and at all times drawing attention to the fact that, while he carries a giant toothbrush and wears a boot on his head, it’s The System that is truly crazy.

His campaign advocates for anarchism, personal responsibility, and regular toothbrushing. 

His most famous campaign promise is to provide every voter with a free pony. Pretty uncontroversial, you’d think. 

You’d be wrong. 

This happened.

ORLY TED??? Vermin Love Supreme responded as only a great statesman could, with tweets, a promise 5,000 ponies per voter, and yes, even a hashtag. A hashtag, I note, which has been shadowbanned!!! What is Elon afraid of???

America, you have a clear choice in these midterms: vote for the one guy actually running for President. Brush your teeth twice a day and get 5,000 ponies. Vermin Supreme has never lied to you!