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Showing posts with the label Fauxmance

Dear Bradley Cooper, I hear you are dating Gigi Hadid

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HAHAHAHAHAHA! <breathe> HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Sorry, I just can't with this. Stop Bradley and your publicists. Just stop. HAHAHA<wheeze>HAHAHAHA .This is post-2010, and the public understands publicity relationships now. Why do you do this at all? What are you hiding? What kind of money are you offering? Are handjobs involved? Whatever. We both know you need to change the narrative from your unfortunate JewFace debacle. I have more questions. I still want to know what was going through your head when you thought looking like you were in the Witness Protection Program was a great idea. Drunk? High? Both? I also question those around you who didn't tell you to rip your nose off your face because you look like Groucho Marx's alter ego. Somehow though fucking this up shows how desperate you are for an Oscar. I know the nose worked for Nicole in The Hours, but her prosthetic nose wasn't seen as a slur. For the record, I don't think you are a racist or anti-semite;