Peckerwood Manor

Tom Holland, one of moviedom's favorite twinkie snack cakes and current paramour of Zendaya, moviedom's newest fashion-girl fashionista - really, she's absolutely killing it - had a big ol' problem with hootch. 

The world is on fire, but luckily, you can still buy AK-47s. Phew! Crisis averted. But twist! Want to look at porn on the Internet? Not allowed, bub. At least if you live in Utah. And now Mississippi. And Virginia. And soon Texas and Florida and Louisiana, too. Why, you ask? Because of the States' new laws, which require age-verification - like a driver's license. When the age-verification went into effect, PornHub, the most popular adult site, saw an 80% decline in traffic. Daaaaaamn. Which means as much as people want to wank on their down time, they don't want an easily-hacked porn site to have their personal intel. Can you say, "Why, yes, I happily surrender my site info to the State at their request. Oh, and I'm a public school teacher and my main search is 'Toilet Whores.'" Given the drop in traffic, PornHub thought, meh, why bother, let's just block those particular States moving forward. And just like that...peens have gone noodle, cooters