OPEN POST: Giraffe Grabs Toddler Because Parents are Bonafide Idiots and A Peacock Eludes Keystone Cops.
Safari Parks are absurd at best to me, and I am being 100 percent judgy. Why would a giraffe want to live on some janky stretch of land in Texas to be ogled and irritated? If I were that giraffe, this would have had a different ending. I would have taken a bite of tender baby flesh and galloped away laughing wildly. Of course, my economy seat on the hell bus was secured a long time ago, so I can say shit like that. Also, there is a peacock on the loose in Saginaw, Michigan. The shenanigans that have happened trying to catch the elusive peacock are the stuff of comedies. Scaling trees, hot pursuit on foot, and that peacock laughs and laughs, and like a roadrunner, off it goes: A student spotted the peacock on Monday while driving to Valley Lutheran High School in Saginaw County. Rachel Horton, the director of the Saginaw County Animal Care and Control Center, mentioned that the student attempted to bring the peacock to school and locate the owner, but the peacock managed to escape....