Toxic Couples: Mark and Elon

 

Elon and Mark make a lovely couple and belong together since they have so much in common: they worship money and power, have weird hair, fuck people over who help them with ideas: this could be the power couple of all power couples. What you didn't know is that these two crazy kids enjoy romantic walks on the beach, frolicking in the sea, and warm, tender embraces, so love was due to bloom. Look at them. Hands entwined, these two evil geniuses look happier than we have ever seen them, and they are now out of the closet and free to be. 

Well, not quite. A hero-Sir Doge of the Coin(he's probably a creep, but for this purpose, he'll do)-turned tech against them and used AI to create these images, and even though they aren't real, they look like two Silicon Valley billionaires who found true love on Grindr. 

That Elon's own irreverent Twitter user created these images made it all the funnier because Meta's Threads has been deemed a success and could take Twitter out of its misery for good. The South African practically delivered the win on bended knee atop a solid gold and diamond platter, looking like Oliver Twist begging for soup. He tried to play it off, but his response, this emoji😂, seemed terse and like it took every ounce of willpower to try to make light of it. This guy has no sense of humor, and we know that men like him never do. They are never in on the joke, and self-deprecation is as foreign to them as compassion, decency, humanity, and reflection. 

So, of course, Musk has challenged Mark to a cage match(again), and then, in a desperate bid to beat him at something, he proposed a dick measuring contest. His desire to measure penises makes me think Elon wants to look at Zuckerberg's naked dick to have something to dream of as he jacks himself into a coma. It is beyond imagining that guy is packing more than a l'il vienna sausage, but the dick heart wants what the dick heart wants. Now, if this had actually occurred, these two billionaires, who give off strong whiffs of Cologne de Incel, would have had their minions working feverishly trying to invent ways to win; both would declare for them to spare no cost-make me win. There would have been prosthetic dicks, dick implants, robotic dicks, and dick pockets where they could put their tiny dicks into eerily real-looking hollowed dildos and in their dicks would go adding several inches to their cocktail weiners. 

What brings infinite joy is that as much as Zuckerberg looks like a soulless Android and is no one I would ever cheer for, however, in comparison, he is the one I have to want to be the victor. Of the two twats Elon is the worst, and there is no need to cite the reasons why. We already know. No one deserves a humiliating blow more than Elon these days, and his fanboys can suffer their dear leaders' embarrassing loss in an arena he wanted to own. First, Andrew Tate, and now their other idol is losing. What's a basement dwelling misogynist supposed to do now?

I could see a scenario in which Elon Musk thinks of Mark Zuckerberg nearly every minute of the day, seething since it is no secret they hate each other. Meta's successes have to feel like being punched in the gut by a boxer wearing cement in their gloves. These pathetic challenges are futile acts of desperation and predictable because he had brought it all on himself. That hubris, enormous arrogance, and thin skin made him buy Twitter; his ineptitude and arrogance have destroyed it. 

So when some guy decided to create a montage of love between these two, we know who hates it the most, and that shit is funny.