OPEN POST: This 100% Alien is the Archeology Find of the Millennium.

By


It seems as though Mexico's Congress has some extra time to tackle the real issues. Poverty? Cartels? No! They took time out on Wednesday to determine if two shriveled grey "corpses" were proof that UFOs exist and that they had been to Earth. 

Jaime Maussan, a self-proclaimed UFOist with a history of pseudoscience and showing false alien remains, should have been adequately vetted. It is called Google. You put his name in the search bar, and there you have enough information about Jaime for any reasonable person to declare that it could be the optics won't look so bueno to the world. "Let us skip it because this guy is muy loco." The fact that he is the Mexican Dr. Phil mixed with L. Ron Hubbard and a large dollop of  "survivor of a bad LSD trip" mashed together didn't raise alarms? Before 2007 (when the tabloid shut its doors), chico would have been the editor of Weekly World News. This is how outlandish this guy is, but this eluded them all? No congressman stepped back and said, "We need to focus on real problems?" For shame, Mexico. For shame. 

Instead, they watched Jaime Maussan, under oath, claim his specimens are proof of aliens' existence. He verbally vomited some sciencey sounding things that, if picked apart, were actually his abuelita's recipe for Menudo. He's done this before, too, in 2015 and also in 2017. Again, no one knew what Google was? And each time, his claims have been debunked. 

I can't for the life of me begin to understand my people sometimes. We love drama, and we love mysticism. Mexico is also where some of the popular telenovelas are filmed, so we love to have moments worthy of wonky closeups. I get all that, but Jaime and his carcasses are ridiculous and resemble props from a Sci-Fi B movie from the 1950s.

The verdict was swift: Nope, not an alien. (No way, Jose, really?)

However, this leaves us with a single question--WTF are those things?




(photo courtesy of Getty Images)




Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Peckerwood Manor's ELECTION PANIC-A-GOGO!

By
Image
It's happening right now! This is place to scream about the election; to vent, to rejoice, to grumble, then scream again. I swear, your throat will feel like sandpaper once this day is done. Have you voted yet? Are you in line? Post pictures! Is your heart skipping beats? Do you fear for the future? Of course you do! But crucially, do you have enough booze and pills to get through this? What, exactly, are you taking or drinking? We want to know. And what are you eating? Are you a sugar or salt whore? We want to know that, too.  Leave those who'd rather not discuss such matters to our special Election-Free Open Post , since today, for one day only, we're gettin' real and gettin' dirty  in our own gasping, shrieking, blood-soaked election post. Hold tight.   
Read more

OPEN POST: We Will Survive!

By
Image
Rise up, my chickens. We're all worth fighting for.  It won't be easy, it won't be fun, but through the long dark of night and on to a new day, it will surely be worth it. We don't regularly refer to politics in our Open Posts, but today, I think it's worth noting that many of us got through eight long years of Ronald Reagan - and it was a nightmare, and for many of my contemporaries, deadly. But here we are, we're still standing. We'll get through this, too, I promise.  What does this mean in the short-term? Tears, fury, booze, pills, or weed, of course. You have my permission - not that you need it - to comfort yourself however you like for the rest of the week. But come Monday, all bets are off. Bitches won't even see us coming. 
Read more

OPEN POST: Monday Music At The Manor With DJ Li'l Scratch!

By
Image
Are you freaking out about the election tomorrow? Me, too. Or maybe you're having a more generalized "It's Monday, oh-my-fucking-gawd" freak out? In either case, please allow Peckerwood Manor's esteemed DJ Li'l Scratch to take you away. Many of you already know about Li'l Scratch, as he regularly lays tracks at "Heavy D's," the Manor's exclusive after-hours club.  Today he's spinning Teri Thornton, a vibrant, husky-voiced jazz singer and piano player who hailed from Detroit. In 1961, she exploded onto the scene with her debut LP, "Devil May Care," demonstrating show-stopping vocal prowess. The reviews were through the roof and so was the public reception, yet just as suddenly - poof - she vanished after a few more LPs, her career thwarted by market changes given the rise of rock 'n' roll. And that was that. She was all but forgotten, reduced to driving a taxi to make ends meet.  But in a jaw-dropping comeback, she re
Read more