How I long for the bygone days of couch-jumping and maniacal laughter. No, for reals. Ever since the writers and actors went on strike, all of your favorite celebs are no longer on the promotional ho stroll making fools of themselves or being tacky. Ergo, celebrity gossip isn't just in the crapper, it's an unsinkable molly brown - or a brown trout of, let's say, the Piers Morgan variety. Eeeow! No one wants that.
How do we know this? Because all the gossip sites are straining really hard to come up with stuff now that the stars are hunkering down - or protesting, God help us, like Susan Sarandon. Take "Page Six," which today has this earth-shattering news: "Barbara Walters' Last Words!" Which are the none-too-earth-shattering, "No regrets. I've had a great life." That's not just a crumb parading as a story, it's your grandfather's flaky beard dandruff and sputum dotting his dark blue shirt. What else does "Page Six" have? More on alleged child abuser Ruby Franke. That's not gossip, thats a fuck-me-sideways-with-a-monkey-wrench horror show and it doesn't count. Neither does their lead story about Derek Hough canoodling with his wife. His wife! WTF? And Derek Hough? Cue *Harpo, who's this woman* gif.
Even TMZ, a usually reliable source of celebrity fuckery, is straining. They're reporting on Travis Barker - such glamour! - who had to cut his tour short with "Blink 182" because of an unspecified family emergency. But c'mon, unless this emergency is a complete head transplant for Travis, I'm not interested. And, oh, yes, there's another story in which "a source" claims that Britney Spears will not be doing OnlyFans, because, let's be honest, save a camera showing her cooter stretched wide with a speculum, we've seen it all.
The only celebrities allowed to speak and potentially give us some decent goss or asshatary are those appearing in SAG-waiver, non-AMPTP productions, like Adam Driver - again, the glamour! - who's promoting "Ferrari," a Michael Mann movie already getting tepid reviews. And what is he talking about? The strike! How he's totally behind it and really supports...huh? Wha? Sorry, but gossip right now is like an awkward sexual advance. You may want it, but it's so clumsy and skird you just want to slap it upside the head.
Which means the best gossip right now is no gossip. It's Kylie Minogue and her verifiably batshit new music video, "Tension." I've no idea what's going on here - someone please explain (or not) - but Kylie looks fantastic and if she's intending to bring back trippy mid-90s club beats, she's succeeded. It's just no substitute for TommyGirl™ jumping on couches and this makes me sad emoticon. For our own sanity, I hope the strikes end soon.
Ah hahahahahaha! Or hooray, hurrah, two snaps and a hey! Can you believe Peckerwood Manor is one year old today? We're still here , dammit, and still kickin'. And here you are, horing and roaring right along with us. Below, each of us joyously reflect on this, our very first Cake Day. And, yes, we come to you in alphabetical order. Why? Because we learned how to do it in preschool and we're still that cute. § AK (aka ECCE HOMO) : Ends and beginnings! We were all shocked by the news of DListed's shuttering, but as sad as it was, I was even sadder to think I'd never again hear from everyone I'd come to know in the comments. But Bree stepped right up and created this spot - and Shonali did her part, too, starting DListed Community (reddit.com) . I felt so happy that we'd still be able to stay in touch, to chat about our mundane jobs, our happinesses and our (hopefully infrequent) sad times. The very first post here, seeing all these familiar names and avi
Welcome to the whimsical world of Finnish hobby horse racing, where madcap enthusiasts prance around with stick-mounted felt horse heads, leaping over obstacles and performing serious dressage routines without falling over, laughing wildly at their own antics. What started as an eccentric pastime has evolved into a serious sport with international recognition. Okay, international might be strong, but it has a following in Scandi countries and my sometimes beloved UK. But let's not kid ourselves, Peckers—it's also a riotously comical spectacle that has captured the interest of niche of equestrian lovers who are too broke to afford a horse, I mean, serious athletes with a love for wood between...like you people. This is why we are taking a field trip to Finland to watch a competition. We might even get raincoaster to suit up and join in, or one of the other Canadians whose own country has a bloodsport called curling. Wrap your pretty heads around this: centuries ago, people were
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