How I long for the bygone days of couch-jumping and maniacal laughter. No, for reals. Ever since the writers and actors went on strike, all of your favorite celebs are no longer on the promotional ho stroll making fools of themselves or being tacky. Ergo, celebrity gossip isn't just in the crapper, it's an unsinkable molly brown - or a brown trout of, let's say, the Piers Morgan variety. Eeeow! No one wants that.
How do we know this? Because all the gossip sites are straining really hard to come up with stuff now that the stars are hunkering down - or protesting, God help us, like Susan Sarandon. Take "Page Six," which today has this earth-shattering news: "Barbara Walters' Last Words!" Which are the none-too-earth-shattering, "No regrets. I've had a great life." That's not just a crumb parading as a story, it's your grandfather's flaky beard dandruff and sputum dotting his dark blue shirt. What else does "Page Six" have? More on alleged child abuser Ruby Franke. That's not gossip, thats a fuck-me-sideways-with-a-monkey-wrench horror show and it doesn't count. Neither does their lead story about Derek Hough canoodling with his wife. His wife! WTF? And Derek Hough? Cue *Harpo, who's this woman* gif.
Even TMZ, a usually reliable source of celebrity fuckery, is straining. They're reporting on Travis Barker - such glamour! - who had to cut his tour short with "Blink 182" because of an unspecified family emergency. But c'mon, unless this emergency is a complete head transplant for Travis, I'm not interested. And, oh, yes, there's another story in which "a source" claims that Britney Spears will not be doing OnlyFans, because, let's be honest, save a camera showing her cooter stretched wide with a speculum, we've seen it all.
The only celebrities allowed to speak and potentially give us some decent goss or asshatary are those appearing in SAG-waiver, non-AMPTP productions, like Adam Driver - again, the glamour! - who's promoting "Ferrari," a Michael Mann movie already getting tepid reviews. And what is he talking about? The strike! How he's totally behind it and really supports...huh? Wha? Sorry, but gossip right now is like an awkward sexual advance. You may want it, but it's so clumsy and skird you just want to slap it upside the head.
Which means the best gossip right now is no gossip. It's Kylie Minogue and her verifiably batshit new music video, "Tension." I've no idea what's going on here - someone please explain (or not) - but Kylie looks fantastic and if she's intending to bring back trippy mid-90s club beats, she's succeeded. It's just no substitute for TommyGirl™ jumping on couches and this makes me sad emoticon. For our own sanity, I hope the strikes end soon.
Here's Cristin Milioti attending the Buddy premiere at the Sundance Film Festival in Park City, UT yesterday. She wore head-to-peeptoe Saint Laurent for the occasion. The top half of this outfit looks very appropriate for the chilly Utah weather. But the whole look takes an unexpected (read: horrifying) turn when she wore lacy lingerie shorts with sheer tights tucked into pink peep toe shoes. The contrast is jarring, and the colour scheme is confusing. What are your thoughts on this look, Peckers?
The Highest Product of Capitalism (after John Heartfield) 1979, Jo Spence, with Terry Dennett Austerity is not an unfortunate economic reality; it is a political weapon. It is how the state disciplines the public while protecting capital, and it has been doing this without impunity for decades, if not longer. Oversight is nonexistent. There is no culpability. It isn’t even questioned, and both political parties are complicit in pushing this as an undeniable truth. The messages differ, but the flavor is the same. The Republicans are undoubtedly more corrupt, crueler, greedier, more vindictive, and recklessly divisive. This creates the illusion that the Democrats are positioned to be the answer and that once they are in power, everything will change. Democratic politicians push this narrative; however, they never rise to the occasion, resulting in bitter disappointment and frustration for those who vote for change. With tepid moral outrage, they make the rounds on MSNBC, give rousin...
Have you ever seen a pair of Crocs and wondered, "how can I make these uglier?" Well Lego has answered your prayers by announcing a multi-year global partnership with the shoe brand. For $200, you can now buy Lego-brand Crocs. The company website says it's "fun footwear that inspires you to build, rebuild and reinvent what makes you you." But could you ever rebuild your dignity after buying a pair? Remains to be seen. Source: Lego
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