Who is June's Shitbag of the Month?
First up is Nick Cannon. The fertile father of 12 decided to insure his balls for $10 million this month, reminding us just how funny he thinks it is to father that many kids and barely be present in their lives. I think spreading his seed has become his entire personality, to the point that he never makes headlines unless he's talking about his dick and what he does with it. This latest stunt might backfire and give one of his gaggle of baby mamas some ideas. But $10 million would last, what, two weeks given all the child support he must be paying? Yuck.
Our second candidate is Caitlyn Jenner. Dan Carney, who works as a valet driver, took to X claiming that he was punched in the face by Jenner when he refused to let her drive off after she'd consumed "11 dirty martinis" at the bar the previous night. Caitlyn doesn't exactly have the best track record when it comes to driving a car. Maybe she should spend the money on a fucking uber instead of getting wasted and assaulting people who don't want her to kill anyone AGAIN.
Speaking of drinking and driving, our third candidate is Justin Timberlake. The washed-up singer was arrested earlier this month when police caught him blowing through a stop sign in Sag Harbour late one night. He allegedly refused a breathalyzer, but the bartender who had served him that night later claimed he had "only had one martini" that evening. Timberlake's PR people have been working overtime to try to save his all-important world tour, but the damage to his already dwindling reputation has been done. Cry me a river!
Our next candidate landed on this list for defending fellow contender, Justin Timberlake! On CBS This Morning, Gayle King chalked Timberlake's DUI charge up to being a simple mistake and nobody knows that as much as he does. She went on to say he's a really great guy. I wouldn't exactly trust Gayle's judgement in character and it was really weird for her to go out of her way to defend someone who got a fucking DUI charge.
Finally, we have Katy Perry. Now she should land on this list simply for wearing that ugly ass outfit, but the other reason she's here is because of her latest collaboration with alleged rapist Dr. Luke for her upcoming album. Dr. Luke was sued by Ke$ha back in 2014 for allegedly drugging and raping her on multiple occasions while he was her music producer. This spawned a countersuit and the two eventually reached a settlement. So when Perry credited Dr Luke on her new song ironically about female empowerment called Woman's World, the singer faced backlash from fans for working with someone with such a reputation of assaulting women.
Well Peckers, there you have it. Place your votes below!
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