Peckerwood Manor

Welcome, my chickens, to the latest edition of "Who's The Thirstiest Ho?" First up, we have Mark Ruffalo, who's baring his man teats and arm pitties for all to see while posing like a bloated squid that's tranqued on benzos and ready for either a wee nap or a moment of lazy-I'll-just-flop-here-and-you-do-me sexytimes-while-my-tushy-burps-a-blaster. I s this thirsty? Oh, my goodness, yes it is.   Also, what is "Perfect" magazine? And do they really think this dead-eyed crusty moose-knuckle is "perfect" or "sexy?" This picture screams raunchy unwashed ball stank, it screams a desperate combover to hide a beachball-sized bald spot, it screams a filthy hairy back sprouting mushrooms and infested with gnats and fermented feta cheese, it screams crutch tips and house slippers and dried earwax specks dotting a black turtleneck and power walking at the mall and nipple-high pants and enough nose hair to knit a sweater.  "I'm 55 no

All you hors that used to hang out in the rink back in the day - this one's for you 😘

Congratulations to the winners of yesterday's Caption This contest!

Carole King - American singer-songwriter and musician - 82 Isabella Gomez - Colombian-American actress - 26 Bella Poarch - American social media personality and singer - 27 Jimmy Bennett - American actor - 28 Kelli Berglund - American actress - 28 Avan Jogia - Canadian actor, singer, author, director and activist - 32 Camille Winbush - American actress and singer - 34 Michael B. Jordan - American actor and producer - 37 Rose Leslie - Scottish actress - 37 Jayde Nicole - Canadian model and businesswoman - 38 David Gallagher - American actor and former model - 39 Tom Hiddleston - English actor - 43 Margarita Levieva - American actress - 44 Zhang Ziyi - Chinese actress - 45 A.J. Buckley - Canadian actor - 47 Charlie Day - American actor, writer, producer and podcaster - 48 Amber Valletta - American actress and model - 50 Colin Egglesfield - American actor - 51 Alejandra Guzman - Mexican musician, singer, composer and actress - 56 Travis Tritt - American singer - 61 Holly Johnson

    ► Academy award winning actress Mo'Nique is telling the world she has the receipts of how Tyler Perry (and Oprah) had her blacklisted from Hollywood.  At an appearance on "Club Shay Shay" podcast, she claims to have an audio recording of Tyler Perry admitting he started the rumor about her being difficult to work with.  Her beef with Oprah goes back years ago when the Queen of Gab overstepped into Mo'Nique's life by having her pervy brother, Gerald, on Oprah's show. Mo'Nique claims Gerald molested her when they were kids.  She refused to go on the show because she did not want to sensationalize her family issues for Oprah's ratings. She claims that Oprah was going to cancel his appearance but she didn't. This infuriated Mo'Nique and it led to her throwing shade at Oprah.  BUT WAIT! There's more!  Mo'Nique also went after Tiffany Haddish for taking cheap shots and digs against her with the media. Whew! That is a lot of d-r-a-m-a .  R

  Photo:  Buzzfeed.com

 

Congratulations to the winners of yesterday's Caption This contest!

John Williams - American composer and conductor - 93 Kathryn Newton - American actress - 27 Bethany Hamilton - American professional surfer and writer - 34 Anderson .Paak - American singer-songwriter, rapper, record producer and drummer - 38 Jeremy Davis - American musician, songwriter and rapper - 39 Cecily Strong - American actress and comedian - 40 Jim Verraros - American singer-songwriter and actor - 41 Pooch Hall - American actor - 48 Abi Titmuss - English actress, tv personality and poker player - 48 Seth Green - American actor and filmmaker - 50 Joshua Morrow - American actor - 50 Big Show - American professional wrestler and actor - 52 Stephanie Courtney - American actress and comedian - 54 Mary McCormack - American actress - 55 Shiva Rose - American actress, activist, blogger and entrepreneur - 54 Trinny Woodall - British entrepreneur, businesswoman, tv presenter and author - 60 Vince Neil - American musician, singer of Mötley Crüe - 63 Lin Tucci - American actress - 64

    ► Cara Delavingne has been cast to play the lead role of Sally Bowles in London's West End production of Cabaret.  The play will open March 11. Ha, ha, ha...okay...I gotta stop laughing at this news. Cara is to acting to what Olive Garden is to Italian cuisine. She has been trying to shift her career from caterpillar eyebrow modeling into a serious actress with lukewarm results.  Cara will be joined on stage by award winning stage actor Luke Treadaway who, in the publicity photo below, is giving us an AWESOME blue steel pose.  Read More Luke Treadaway and Cara Delevingne to star in stage production of Cabaret. Photo: Emilio Madrid/BBC.com Comment:   I recently saw Suicide Squad which she was in alongside Margot Robbie and Jared Leto (who stunk as The Joker).  I kept thinking that Cara must have watched The Ring a dozen times for inspiration to play June Moone. Except for Margot Robbie (who was okay...not great, just okay), everyone else did a lousy acting job. Now I know why it

Nigella's show, Nigella Bites, was a comfort show for me for a few years. It was on BBC America, and I would make sure my godfather programmed his nifty DVR to catch it weekly. I turned others onto it, and we would watch Nigella and the OG Iron Chef. I thought she was sexy and gorgeous, so it wasn't all about the food. I crushed on her for a bit, but then I became very interested in her textures and British combinations. Brits aren't known for cuisine or culinary genius, but here was Nigella putting together things that looked tasty and inviting. I decided to highlight her because she became an international star and embraced her homey recipes and love of cozy homemade meals. Also, she was slightly plump, which means she ate what she made, which I liked.  Brief biography: Nigella Lawson is a respected English food writer and television cook. I call her a cook, not a chef, and I use that term as a compliment. Many people have the title chef and cook uninspired food in restau

Woe to thee who face the wrath of Scorpio, The Demon Pussy Of Peckerwood Manor. In truth, few have seen her, though if you're assigned to feed her - as we all are, since we're on monthly rotation - you know what will happen if you're even one minute late with her bowls of Shrimp Etouffee and Pinot Noir. You will pay. Not right away, of course. She'll make you wait.  Scorpio doesn't always intend to be evil, necessarily, but she won't hesitate to punish those who do not hold her in highest esteem. If you should be so lucky as to see her, you must pet her - and that includes her downy-soft belly when she rolls over on her back. Is it a trap? Who knows? But you are compelled to find out.  On a related note, the Manor's infirmary is open 24/7, though if your injuries are life-threatening, kindly call for EMS transport. On an unrelated note, cook's main course tonight is baked cod fillets  with steamed eggplant and tahini sauce with pine nuts and preserved l

 

Congratulations to the winners of yesterday's Caption This contest!

Steve Bronski - Scottish singer-songwriter, member of Bronski Beat - (1960-2021) Jake Goldberg - American actor - 28 Gabbie Hanna - American internet personality and singer-songwriter - 33 Kerli - Estonian singer-songwriter - 37 Stephen Colletti - American actor and tv personality - 38 Tina Majorino - American actress - 39 Deborah Ann Woll - American actress - 39 Jeremy Meeks - American model and actor - 40 Cerina Vincent - American actress - 45 Ashton Kutcher - American actor, producer and entrepreneur - 46 Kelly Choi - Korean-American tv personality - 48 Marlo Hampton - American actress - 48 Essence Atkins - American actress - 52 Robyn Lively - American actress - 52 Sully Erna - American singer-songwriter and musician - 56 Jason Gedrick - American actor - 59 Chris Rock - American comedian, actor and filmmaker - 59 David Bryan - American musician and songwriter, keyboard player of Bon Jovi - 62 Garth Brooks - American singer-songwriter - 62 Eddie Izzard - British stand-up

    ► American singer and songwriter Toby Keith has died. He was 62. Cause of death was stomach cancer which he had been battling since 2022. Toby's career began in 1993 with the debut single of "Should've Been A Cowboy". The song was an instant hit ranking #1 on the Billboard Country chart.  From there, he continued to release hit singles and albums over the years.  Toby also dabbled in acting by appearing in TV commercials and guest appearances on TV shows. Toby was a polarizing figure politically. He described himself "a conservative Democrat".  He supported President George Bush Jr.; but he was against the Iraq war. He supported President Barack Obama by calling him, "the best Democratic candidate we've had since Bill Clinton". But years later, he became an independent and played at Orange Turd's inaugural ball. Read More Comment : Condolences to his family.    Toby Keith in 2021. Photo: Erika Goldring/WireImage/People.com ► Tay-Tay an

Over the weekend, hundreds of Golden Retrievers descended on the city of Golden, Colorado to celebrate the annual Goldens in Golden event. As you can see, Colorado was Colorado-ing. Credit: KUSA (9news) That rain quickly turned to some slushy ass snow. Greeley is normally our smelly city, but I'm sure Golden gave it a run for its money with a nice wet dog scent hovering over downtown. So which do you prefer, wet dog or wet cow? Despite the weather, attendees seemed to be having an awesome time and thoroughly enjoyed their annual takeover of the downtown. Read more here:  https://www.9news.com/article/news/local/goldens-in-golden-colorado-snow/73-2f54efdd-5a2e-4e33-8eed-53a1bf2aad6d

 

Congratulations to the winners of yesterday's Caption This contest!

Rick Astley - English singer - 58 Charlie Heaton - English actor and musician - 30 Tinashe - American singer-songwriter, dancer and actress - 31 Allison Holker - American dancer, choreographer and actress - 36 Dane DeHaan - American actor - 38 Kris Humphries - American retired professional basketball player - 39 Crystal Reed - American actress - 39 Alice Eve - British-American actress - 42 Calum Best - British-American tv personality - 43 Drita D’avanzo - American reality tv personality - 48 Neri Oxman - Israeli-American designer and professor - 48 Kim Zmeskal - American retired artistic gymnast and gymnastics coach - 48 Amy Robach - American tv reporter - 51 Brian Stepanek - American actor - 53 David Hayter - Canadian-American actor, screenwriter, director and producer - 55 Axl Rose - American singer-songwriter, Guns N’ Roses puppet master - 62 Kathy Najimy - American actress, comedian, director, writer, producer and activist - 67 Robert Townsend - American actor, director, c