NEPO WATCH! Meet Kingston, The Teen Son Of Gwen Stefani And Gavin Rossdale! He Writes ‘Justin Bieber-Quality’ Songs!

Step right up! In this, Peckerwood Manor's inaugural Nepo Watch! post, we introduce Kingston, the 17 year-old son of Gwen Stefani - pictured above after her head transplant (allegedly!) - and her ex-husband, Gavin Rossdale. Kingston, we're told breathlessly by both parents, is destined to have a major music career, which has everything to do with his natural, God-given talents, thank you, and nothing to do with being Gavin's and Gwen's son. After all, insists Gavin, Kingston doesn't even like any of the music his parents have released over the last few decades, so how on earth could they give him a leg up in his career? Kingston is keeping his music career "independent" from his parents, they claim. 

How independent? Thanks for asking! So independent that Kingston recently performed his music at stepdad Blake Shelton's Oklahoma bar to riotous acclaim and adulation - and Blake didn't birth Kingston, did he? Nepo who? Moreover, Gavin is being praised by the trio for writing "Justin Bieber-quality songs" - and Justin didn't birth Kingston, did he? So there. And besides, claiming that Kingston writes "Justin Bieber-quality songs" is a shady insult isn't it? I'm fairly certain you wouldn't insult your own darling wildly privileged child or stepchild by claiming that they write "Justin Bieber-quality songs" if you were trying to boost their career prospects. So there again.

In addition, Gavin - pictured above after starting Ozempic (allegedly!) - also notes that Kingston is being praised on TickyTacky for having "talent running through his veins," but that doesn't mean said veiny talent comes from him or Gwen. Obvi. Kingston will find great success and win many Grammys all by his lonesome, despite being the son of two famous and very wealthy parents - and you're just jelly and a hater and "mean-spirited," according to Jamie Lee Curtis, if you dare suggest otherwise, you pleb. Besides, Gavin wants all his children to "contribute to society," and since Kingston isn't working with him or Gwen or even Blake on his music, he's totes real and doing it on his own and will succeed wildly on his own steed. Phew. I'm so glad that's settled. Till next time on Nepo Watch!

Photo Credits: SplashNews, Getty Images