EVENING NIGHTCAP: Brooklyn Is At It Again. Uncross Your Legs - Basic Instinct Reboot Is Coming.

By

 

 

► Brooklyn Beckham, the Jeopardy answer to "Worthless Nepo Kids", is courting culinary controversy with his latest fake chef stunt. I'm calling it a stunt because his knowledge of the culinary arts can fit inside a shot glass. He thinks Thermador is Thor's younger brother. While sunning on his yacht off a Mediterranean harbor, BB decided to multi-task by showing how he cooks pasta while being an eco-warrior and peddling his Cloud 23 sauce that doubles as a hair shampoo bottle. He scooped sea water into a pot to cook the pasta. BB failed to realize his yacht is anchored in a harbor where other yachts and boats are parked. Parked vessels leak diesel fuel into the water, dump sewage and other nasty stuff. The internet was quick to point this out to boy genius, reminding him that using sea water is a good way to contract ecoli and water borne ailments. Even if he was out in the middle of the ocean without the issue of nearby yachts dumping their junk (looking at you Jeff Bozo and Leo), using sea water for pasta is waaaaay too salty. You don't cook pasta at home with a brick of salt in the water. Dumbass. Also, the oceans of today are not the same as 500 years ago when they weren't being used as floating landfills.  Read More

Brooklyn Beckham cooks a tomato pasta dish using sea water (Brooklyn Beckham/Instagram)
Brooklyn Beckham using sea water to make pasta, 2025. Photo: Brooklyn Beckham IG / Yahoo.com

Comment:  I wouldn't eat anything made by this dingus. And I've eaten gas station sushi. I want BB to go on a million dollar glamping trip to show how to make a salad from moss, tree bark, and dead leaves. If you're going to be stupid, at least make it entertaining. If this moron really wanted to be a chef he would go to culinary school. But he's too lazy and entitled to put in the work. It's one failed venture after another for this man of leisure. At least he married into billionaire wealth.

 YARN | If he hasn't figured out he's useless by now, he probably never will | Elf (2003) | Video gifs by quotes | 86208240 | 紗

► Director and screenwriter Joe Eszterhaus (80) who gave us Flashdance, Basic Instinct, Sliver, Showgirls, and Jagged Edge is dusting off his typewriter to reboot Basic Instinct. The 1992 movie starred Sharon Stone as a femme fatale crime writer and Michael Douglas as a detective. To capitalize on Basic Instinct being a box office hit, Eszrterhaus wrote a  1993 sequel called Sliver, with Sharon and Billy Baldwin. It was a colossal failure and a piece of shit. Then, in 2006, Basic Instinct 2 came out with Sharon Stone and David Morrissey. It was an even bigger pile of shit than Sliver, earning 6% Rotten Tomatoes.  Eszterhaus left Hollywood years ago and has been living in Cleveland, Ohio. Um, I can think of a million better places to live if I had his kind of money. Anyhoo, in an interview with The Wrap, he said he and Amazon-MGM agreed on $4 million for him to write the reboot. He said the film will be anti-woke meaning that, " dialogue-wise she (main character) will be open about her sexuality, character-wise she will be raunchy at times, funny, iconoclastic and all of those things". No word if Sharon Stone (67) will reprise her role a third time. That is, unless the movie takes place at an assisted living complex or at the The Villages in Florida. I hear residents at The Villages are as horny as teenagers with raging hormones.Read More 

Joe Eszterhas on His 'Basic Instinct ...
Joe Eszterhaus with promo poster. Photo: The Wrap

Comment:  Damn, get a clue Joe, no one is asking for ANOTHER reboot / refresh / rehash. The last 2 were mega flops. Then again,  I don't fault him for taking the $4 million Amazon-MGM is paying him to crank out some crap. He's 80 yr old and probably doesn't give a damn anymore. A check is a check. If Sharon is in this third-time-is-hopefully-the-charm to resurrect the franchise, I predict it will be in the role of being a mentor to a young coming crime writer who will follow her path. I can see Sydney Sweeney being cast in this mess. She's currently Hollywood's "Flavor of the Month" and is knee deep in business with Jeff Bozo and Amazon to launch a lingerie line. 

a man and a woman are standing next to each other with a sign that says schitts creek in the corner

 


 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

PECKERWOOD'S WEEKLY LUNOCRACY POST! For the Week of 7/28/2025 ( 80s Politics, The Reagan Era and Thatcher's Britain)

By
Image
The Reagan era — a time when the American Dream got a perm, Wall Street got high on its own supply, and compassion was drowned in a jacuzzi at Studio 54.

 This was the decade when *greed* wasn’t just good — it was federally endorsed. When your country told you that if you weren’t rich, healthy, or white with a good TV smile, you probably deserved whatever hell you were living through. AIDS? Ignore it. Crack epidemic? Criminalize it. Union workers? Fire ‘em. Trees? Cut ‘em. Poor people? Trickle something on them and call it economics.  Ronald Reagan sold optimism the way televangelists sell salvation: loud, rehearsed, and with a suspicious bank account offshore. “It’s morning in America,” he beamed, like some kind of demented cheerleader for a dying empire — while actual Americans were waking up to layoffs, homelessness, and lethal indifference.

 Don’t have healthcare? Bootstraps. Can’t afford college? Bootstraps. Your rent is half your income? Pull harder, baby.

 Meanwhile, Nanc...
Read more

OPEN POST: Would You Ride Siren's Curse?

By
Image
Siren's Curse is the newest roller coaster ride at Cedar Point amusement park in Ohio. The attraction, which opened at the end of June, is the first tilt coaster in the USA. This means that it has a section of track that disconnects from its starting position, turns 90 degrees, and attaches to a steep decline track. But last week, the ride came to a stop mid-tilt, stranding its passengers. This is the fourth time that this has happened since the ride opened! The park's spokesman says that this is due to the ride's safety system restarting, and says it's the equivalent to a check-engine light. Riders had to safely exit the coaster before it could resume. Would you ride on Siren's Curse after so many incidents in its first month of operation? Are you a roller coaster junkie or do you prefer safer amusement park rides? Source: UPI, Cedar Point amusement park
Read more

OPEN POST: 1980s Dinner Party

By
Image
The party is already in full, frothy swing when you arrive, and you're 45 minutes late. Welcome to Greenwich Village, mid-1980s, and Elkie’s apartment is packed tighter than a cocaine executive’s day planner. Her duplex walk-up smells like Campari, Shalimar, and hair products. The stereo's blasting the Talking Heads at an anxiety-inducing volume, and someone’s brought a ferret. It’s wearing a leather collar. Naturally. Elkie herself—daughter of a dubious, possibly fascist German businessman and a former Miss Switzerland runner-up—is gliding around in a backless gold lamé number and neon green heels. She has the posture of a disco giraffe and the voice of a chain-smoking dove. She never blinks. No one knows what she *does*, but everyone knows she’s *done* things. Legendary things. She curates chaos. Warhol is in the corner, snapping Polaroids with slow, skeletal movements. Basquiat’s tagging the inside of Elkie’s coat closet with a Sharpie he stole from the hostess stand at Danc...
Read more