THE ROVING PECKER PRESENTS: "Morning Wood" by D'Hermitage!

Greetings, Manor Hors! Periodically, "The Roving Pecker" presents urgent missives from filthy esteemed guest writers. Today's is from D'Hermitage!

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Peckers! Welcome to the virgin issue of "Morning Wood," the latest addition to the manor where we start your day in green - meaning nature matters, the birds and the bees, the moss and the trees, famous people adjacent, and some-such morning activities. But not the numbered ones! We are not savages after all.

I know, I know, when you think morning wood, Judi Dench is not what comes to mind, but today, we change that. Why-the-trunk-not? Because Judi Dench (Dame to the monarchists), loves wood all day long. Yes, the living one. Judi Dench is a hor for trees! Shush your hor mouth you say? Au contraire. She has lots of trees and other vegetation, and she names her trees in memory of her friends. I don’t know how the Linnaean nomenclature peeps feel about that, but she’s in her 90s, might outlive the centenarian D. Attenborough (just because of her youth), she’s a great actress, can recite any Shakespearean prose for any occasion, so she gets a pass and can call trees whatever she wants. She also got David Austin's company to name a rose after her (on sale for 20 pounds) (told ya, she's a hor). 

But then again, Austin also recently named a rose after the man who gave us Brooklyn, the resident confused (misunderstood?) chef so…(ahem). Anyway, anyone who actively digs (ha!) botany and its offshoots (again ha!) gets +10 points for being a solid return on Earth's oxygen investment. Here's Dame Judy ooohing and aaaahhhing at a 1500-year-old yew tree, cooing and listening with a tree stethoscope to its rumblings. Adorable.

When you visit Paris, wander in Jardin des Plantes. There are beautiful trees there that were planted as early as 1630s (Robinia Pseudoacacia), and a number of them from 1700s. Isn't it nice that just when your reflection begins to alarm you, you see something waaaaaaay older than you and admire its mark in time? This is also one of the perks of surrounding oneself with remarkable antiques and baroque masters (duplicates only, we don’t want to be ransacked nor kidnapped) Maybe someday, a tree will be planted in your memory and friends will call it Psychoacacia. 

Because I also mentioned Brooklyn, here’s a harlot chicken to make up for the unintended early excitement; we don’t want anyone to leave here not sated.

Too soon? Well, ever heard of the expression breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dine like a pauper? Take note, a prince, not THE musically talented sessy one from Minnesota!

Good morning to you and shoutout to your favorite wood! tree!

Art and Photo Credits: Magic Mango Studios, D'Hermitage, David Austin Rose Shop